"I have struggled with my weight for as long as I can remember. Even as a kid I can remember going to a nutritionist so that I could learn to eat properly and lose weight. Yet here I am at 30 still struggling with my weight. The lowest weight I have ever been in my adult life was when I entered college. I was 180 pounds – still 30 pounds higher than what the national ‘standards’ say I should be. Even at that weight, I looked in the mirror and saw myself as fat and undesirable and a failure at mastering my weight. Today, as I sit at 335 pounds, I look back at pictures of my 180 pound self and think of how crazy I was to hate myself when I was that size – and even how crazy I am to hate myself now.
I have tried every diet under the sun. I’ve done Weight Watchers, South Beach, Atkins, Cabbage Soup, etc. The crazy thing is they all worked!! My body responded every time I tried to take it down a path of healthier living. The problem is I always saw these diets as quick fixes and never wrapped my mind around the fact that it has to be a total lifestyle change. So slowly I would revert back to my old ways…and the pounds would once again pile up…and I would end up gaining back all that I had lost and more. The next time I start a weight loss program, I won’t make that same mistake again.
After watching all of the Oprah shows about weight, watching the Biggest Loser (I’ve even applied/auditioned in the past to be a contestant), Dr. Oz, etc. I am inclined to believe that I am an emotional eater. I wish I could say that I recognize when I am eating emotionally and when I am eating because I truly am hungry. I guess if I could figure that out I would have lost the weight by now. I can say that I know that I eat to fill some void that I feel in my life. At a young age it was the void of growing up without my father. Now I eat to quiet that voice that tells me that I am a failure because I’m not where I want to be in life right now. The cycle is vicious. I eat to quiet that voice and the more weight I gain, the more that voice tells me that I am a failure and that I will never take control of my weight and my health. It hurts. I know people look at me differently. I find myself not wanting to go out much because I don’t want people to see me and comment on how much weight I’ve gained – even if they do it behind my back. My husband tells me everyday that I am beautiful – but because I don’t feel it within myself his words fall on deaf ears. I want to feel beautiful!
A few months ago I went to the doctor because I wasn’t feeling well. I found out that day that I am a diabetic. I cried. I still cry to this day when I think about it. The doctor told me not to cry because it was reversible and I can do something about it. I hold on to that sentence – I can do something about it. Both my mom and dad have diabetes – but they were much, much older when they were diagnosed. I am now setting a new record in my family as the youngest with diabetes – it’s a title that I don’t want to hold. I need help. I want to start having children one day, but I am afraid that I will pass my bad habits, my diabetes trait, my weight issues on to them. I am afraid to start having children because my 5’5” frame can barely carry the weight that it currently holds, let alone bear the additional weight of 9 months of pregnancy.
I immediately responded when I saw that Grant was asking for people who wanted to change their life and no longer be morbidly obese. Everyday I read about the marathons and the trainings and the workouts that Grant offers and pray that I could become more physically fit. One of my goals is to one day run and finish the Marine Corps marathon. I am tired of being held down (literally and figuratively) by my weight. I deserve to be healthy and happy. I owe it to God and to myself and to my family to be the best me that I can be. I can’t do all that God would have me to do in this life if I am constantly bogged down by failing health and a failing spirit or if I leave this earth too soon because my body gives out. I would like the opportunity to take control of my weight and take control of my life. I want to lose the weight and keep it off! I ask that you strongly consider me for entrance into your weight loss program. I will not fail."
With those final four words, she made it a very easy decision - Her heart, her urgency, passion, and desire to change and thrive jumped off the page. Success is more often attained with the support of family, not to mention the wonderful bonding and psychological benefits of working out and cooking with your partner, so I decided to work with both her and her husband - They want to start a family and they want to raise their family right by being examples - and they want to be healthy so they can live a long, enjoyable, robust life. The only thing they lack, and what many of us lack, is simply awareness.
As a nation, we are gravely confused about what to eat. Processed food has turned a simple, biological, life sustaining instinct into a tangled, complex mess that kills millions each year and leaves us clueless. We try to attribute the causes of "Western Diseases" to so called villains such as saturated fat (which promotes efficient fat metabolism, weight control and stable energy levels and has little or no association with heart disease risk - Source: Framingham and Nurses Health studies) or cholesterol (an essential metabolic nutrient with little or no relevance to heart disease risk - Source: Framingham and Nurses Health studies) and turns a blind eye to the poisons that lurk in processed foods. As we have become more “health conscious” we’ve become fatter than ever as a nation to the point that obesity is now OUT.OF.CONTROL. A Johns Hopkins University study estimates that by 2030, 86% of Americans will be overweight or obese. (Right now we are at 65%) NIH reports that based on current trends, ALL Americans will be overweight or obese by 2230!
It’s “No carbs!” today, its “All the carbs you want, but no fat!” tomorrow. No sugar, no sodium, no cholesterol, no saturated fats. It's based on this study (paid for by whom?) only to be countered by that study (paid for by whom??). It’s the semi regular demonization of one macro ingredient combined with the next scientific breakthrough that your body cant possibly get enough of - OMEGA 3’S!! ANTIOXIDANTS!! - This constant misleading and manipulation allows food processors to create millions of “food like substances” (to borrow a term used by Michael Pollan) each year, designed not for your health but for high profits, efficient transportation, long shelf lives and on-the-go convenience. These substances are mostly comprised of corn derivatives, enriched flour, added sugars and trans fats along with a host of other preservatives and laboratory marvels - all of which have no nutritional value, are products of modern industrialization and are foreign substances to our bodies that have evolved over millions of years to subsist and thrive on whole foods.
As we attempt to navigate our way through this mess, we are often (and no not always) led astray by media looking for a trendy story or the latest celebrity diet (“GRAPEFRUITS ONLY!!”) If there was no confusion, there would be no need for the media to explain things to us - who by the way stays in business by selling ad space in part to food processors - where do you get most of your nutrition advice? We’ve become a nation that is overfed, yet malnourished.
It may come as a surprise that weight loss is a secondary goal in my intervention with this couple. The goal of Project 365 and my commitment to them, so long as they stay committed to change, is to provide them with the educational tools and guidance so that they may develop a healthy lifestyle. I can't hold their hand forever, so I won't do it now. It's up to them to read the material I provide for them and its up to them to follow the workouts. If they become more aware of their body’s requirements, more aware of the debilitating impact processed foods has on their body and the environment and the life enriching impact of REAL FOOD and fitness, their lives will be forever changed. Train the mind and the body will follow.
You can follow our journey right here with regular updates in their own words. Be inspired by them. Be an inspiration to them. Start your own Project 365 and transform your life one day at a time.
No comments:
Post a Comment